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Nine Yards … and counting.

Nine Yards … and counting.

Category Archives: Uncategorized

A Harrowing Tale of Halloween

30 Friday Oct 2020

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When I was a young innocent boy in the first grade, my family lived in the desert hole of Battle Mountain, Nevada. This was probably ’61 or ’62, when the state was in the rough era of whiskey, women and gold mines, which makes sense in my mind that they should go together.

I strongly remember the Halloween of that year, when three of us went on the “Trick or Treat” campaign. I remember my older sister was there, and either an older brother or a younger sister. I distinctly remembering seeing a house, that although did not have the porch light on (to tell kids we have candy for you), it did have a light in the window with noise from a TV or radio inside. So, common sense would be, there is someone in that house, thus candy.

I remember knocking on the door and standing back to wait. No one answered. Stepped forward again and knocked harder, then stepped back. Still nothing. Tried once more, and the door creaked opened.

We gleefully announced, “trick’er treat!”

Standing before us was the silhouette of a man that filled the doorway, and by the words he spoke, he was not happy.

Here is what he said. Read it the way he spoke. Slowly, one word at a time.

“You woke me up. I ought’a switchboard yo’ ears.”

We really did not know what to say, other than to repeat, “Trick’er treat.”

There was a moment of silence, then the silhouette moved his hand into his pocket, withdrew it, and reached out and dropped a silver dollar in my sister’s hand. The door closed and we turned away. I don’t remember if we continued to add to our collection of candy, or if we made a direct line back home, because we were now filthy rich.

Once home, it seemed there was a delay of several days trying to decide how to divide 1 silver dollar evenly between the three of us. I knew, even at my young age, that each would get 33 cents, but somebody would get one extra. To this day, every Halloween, I wonder what happened to that extra penny. Did it go to my oldest sister? Did my mother keep it as a service fee? My worry is the penny went to one of my older brothers who didn’t deserve it, because none suffered through the harrowing ordeal.

I realize it is one of those things I will find out upon my demise and entrance into Heaven. Whichever of you guys got it, I will find out.

 

The Produce of Brazil

14 Wednesday Oct 2020

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One thing that stands out in any country I have been in, is the differences in food.  Ethiopia seemed to have an affection for jalapeños.  In everything we ate, we had to open it up and remove them.  Turkey loves its yogurts and its breads.  Russia has very flavorful eggs and strong onions with lots of flavor.  And they have wonderful breads and plenty of vodka.  Brazil has so many differences, it is an amazing thing to experience.  Look at this star fruit below.  It has a very subtle sweet taste.

Below is Papaya that is very popular in Brazil.  It is also common in parts of the US, but not where I am from, so I posted it here.  Brazilians call it, mamão papaia

Here is the Brazilian melon called, Melão.  It is the same taste as the Honeydew melon in the US.

This is a Brazilian grapefruit according to Dani.  It is not the same as the melon above.

This is the Brazilian orange.

The fruit below is Chuchu. It is cut up into small pieces, boiled and eaten after it has chilled. It has a light taste and seems would be better if cooked, then salted and eaten while still warm.

This thing is called Inhame, which translates to “yam“. It is a root that is cut up and cooked.

While we are here, I will continue posting any produce from Brazil that I come across. Until then, eat well, which does not include McDonald’s.

 

 

… and now for something a little unusual.

30 Wednesday Sep 2020

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Look at the two bottles of Jameson whiskey below. They appear identical except for size, but the liquid inside the larger bottle is fake. This is something I discovered about a month ago when we ordered whiskey and other things online and had them delivered to the apartment. The bottle has a taste like watered down Johnny Walker. We contacted the distributor who denied everything. I looked closely and could detect that the label over the bottle cap was not pasted down completely, but other than that, there was a label on the bottle showing some sort of Brazilian info. The bottles are genuine as well as the caps, so I don’t know how they were able to do that. I poured a little into small glasses, and the fake whiskey even has a lighter color. I now remember drinking Jameson at restaurants that have that taste, and next time that happens I will send it back.

The Meat of Brazil, (and a few other places)

26 Saturday Sep 2020

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Americans have a passion for bacon, but the Brazilian bacon is very different.  They do have the thin-sliced bacon in Brazil if you look for it, but this is mostly what you find:

I cut into small pieces and use it in my beans, but I have yet to try slicing it very thin and frying it. I am guessing the fat is desired, probably for soups. I am guessing this is something most people have seen in the US, just not me. I purchased a whole chicken to roast in the oven and upon unwrapping it, I see that the butcher was kind enough to leave the feet and head inside for my consumption. I didn’t really notice the head until I picked it up thinking it was just a large gizzard. No, I did not cook these, as they were donated to the lixo (trash). But think, how would anyone eat a chicken head? My research tells me they boil it and suck the brains out.It was not uncommon to see whole goats hanging in the markets in Russia, and in Ethiopia, one of my local technicians wanted to gift us with a lamb for the holidays. It was delivered fresh to the Embassy with blood still dripping out of the wrapping.  We took it home and put it in the freezer and gave most of it away, because it was just too much for us to eat.

This is a picture I posted several years ago while in Ethiopia, of a man on a bicycle taking his lamb to be butchered for the upcoming holidays.  I’m kinda thinking the lamb is enjoying his last ride.

We have a good friend who I used to work with, who has invested in a restaurant with several others.  We ordered some of the food online and got this:We were very impressed with that, and here is another online purchase.  It reminds me of the typical Brazilian BBQ where it is cooked, sliced and placed out for all to eat. The Brazilian BBQ is a social event with people milling about and eating with their fingers as soon it is served.Here is Dani’s attempt to make stuffed peppers.  Not spicy, but sweet with a lot of flavor.  She will get hotter peppers next time.  Someday she will make these for the Family Reunion.Okay. Visit more later.  D&D

 

Clear Marbles and a Slingshot

11 Friday Sep 2020

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That is all a man needs to past the time away.

Remember when I was at the other apartment and I used my slingshot to send marbles down to the local pet shop to get the dogs to stop barking? Well, I miss those days, too. But what I do to make up for it, I will wonder out onto my 4th floor balcony in the evenings and look for a victim. Usually, I see a few people walking to the metro station a few blocks away and when they are down the street at a good distance, I will fire a marble at them and see if I get any reaction. So far, no one seems to notice.Last night, I had the unique opportunity to fire a marble at an unsuspecting police car. It sat at the traffic light below, and instead of turning at the corner like they usually do, it continued down the street. When it went the recommended distance, I pulled back, and to be sure it traveled far enough, pulled it a little further and released. At that split second in time, one of the elastic bands broke free and the marble hit the corner of my apartment building, fell out into the street below and danced a little, then rolled down into the sewer. Tragic disappointment.

I’ll keep trying though.

 

Oddities

06 Sunday Sep 2020

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The World is full of them.  Here are a few from all over.

This McDonald’s is on the famous Paulista Ave, about a half mile from our apartment.  It is two stories high and it used to be a mansion.  The following statement came from the epocanegocios.globo.com website:

The McDonald’s has just opened the doors of its thousandth store in Brazil, in an old mansion on Avenida Paulista, in São Paulo.  In the new space, the fast food chain will offer space for shows, self-service totems, an automated treadmill that goes from the kitchen to the drive-thru, in addition to outdoor environments designed for customers to post photos on social networks.  The restaurant, called “Méqui 1000”, will be open 24 hours a day and has the capacity to serve 220 people.

When we walk to our friend’s restaurant, we pass by this work of graffiti.  Someone had a lot of time on their hands.  Works of art like this are common in Brazil.

And in the category of Idiotic:  It is a known fact, the TSA in Lubbock Texas is second to none.  As I went through security, the agent called me back to take a look at something in my back-pack.  Okay, no problem – I always play along with these games.  The X-ray of the pack showed an image of a small gun.  Again, no problem as I reached in and pulled out my apartment key-chain with a tiny replica of a gun.  This is where Idiocy raised its ugly head.  The agent had to take it to his supervisor to see if it was okay for me to take it with me!  Was he expecting that the tiny gun actually shoots tiny bullets?  Was he thinking the tiny gun would be used to hijack the plane to Cuba?  You decide.  As you can tell, the dangerous key-chain is still in my possession.

The Elephant Shrew is an interesting oddity that has nothing to do with Brazil.  Analysis revealed this shrew is not classified as a true shrew, but is in fact more closely related to the elephant.  Such a tiny creature that is related to the largest of land mammals.  Below is a photo taken from Wilkipedia.  It is by Joey Makalintal from Pennsylvania, USA – A Fascinating One, CC BY 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=5817138

And in case you need something to add to the bafflement of the year 2020, take a look at this picture and tell me what you would do.

If you don’t see it, send me a detailed email describing what you don’t see.

Later.

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