Several months ago I helped the Marines host a Wingfest to raise money.  I supplied several bottles of the hot sauce used in the original Buffalo recipe thanks to Terese, who had the foresight to put two cases of the magical stuff in our household shipment.

When the Marines sold the wings, only the Americans and a few brave Brazilians dug in.  If you remember from some of my earlier posts, the Brazilians are not into spicy food.  Not even black pepper.  So last Monday, being President’s Day, I decided to spend some time coming up with a Brazilian-wing sauce recipe.

I put a package of wings in the air fryer to cook and looked through my cabinets to see what all I could come up with.  There was a bottle of raspberry vinaigrette dressing with an expiration date of June 2010, but it still had the proper color.  And a bottle of Kraft’s Original BBQ sauce, dated sometime in 2011.  I had a bottle of Texas balsamic vinegar given to me by a boss about 4 years ago, and I also found some Texas olive oil.

Now I must tell you, there is a gentleman at the Consulate, who along with his wife loves cooking.  They produce an abundance of food at any setting they prepare.  He told me, “Hot wing sauce is easy to make.  Take any hot sauce, add vinegar and oil and Voila!”

So I figure I could take anything, add vinegar and oil and Voila!  I could see my future where the City of Sao Paulo would have a parade in my honor for creating the perfect wing sauce for Brazilians.  The recipe would go “viral” and I would reject any idea of patenting it, instead giving it to all mankind (and womankind).  Even the small town where I was born in Texas would have a Main Street parade in my honor.  Both blocks would be lined with my fellow Texans and we would end up at the Knights of Columbus Hall for drinks.

Well … the best laid plans often go awry.

I mixed the raspberry vinaigrette with some Texas olive oil and I notice strange flakes in the sauce, and the smell was not as enticing as I had hoped.  So, I put the mixture in the microwave to “meld”.  Within the 20 seconds in the microwave, I realized this was not going to be the mixture I had hoped for.  There is nothing I can compare to the smell of the ‘melded’ mixture.  It had turned into a slightly jelled mud and I quickly placed it in the sink and flushed it down with bleach.

I turned my attention to the 7-year-old BBQ sauce and decided it needed some hard liquor.

Now, let’s have a quick side note here.  Several years ago in Ankara, Terese took a flight home for a week and I decided to pamper myself with the perfect steak.  I went to the commissary at the local air base and pick a small flawless medallion steak and marinated it overnight in whiskey.  I did not want to use any of my good whiskey, so I choose a cheap bottle that I only offer to people who don’t know what good whiskey is.

After the marination, I placed it gently on a grill and cooked it to a perfect medium.  Laying with a large baked potato and a salad with Ranch dressing, it minded me of a Rembrandt painting.

The salad was refreshing.  The potato was delicious.  And the steak tasted like the cheap whiskey.  I did not finish it.

So, with that lesson learned I decided to use good liquor, and this time I chose Captain Morgan rum.

I mixed the ingredients together and proceeded to taste.  It was acceptable.  I dare say the Brazilians would approve, and it was decided by a majority vote, this is what I will use at the next Marine Wingfest.  … along with the original Buffalo sauce for the crazy Americans.

It may not make me famous among the Brazilians, or the townsfolk of my birth, but will suffice in bringing the Brazilians together with the Americans who like hot spicy food.

If nothing else, upon my demise when I arrive at the Pearly Gates, the kind gentleman with the white beard and flowing robe will say to me, “Oh, you’re the guy who made the perfect wing sauce for the Brazilians.  Yeah, I hear of you often!  Come on in and report to the kitchen immediately.”

With my luck they will hand me a list of things to do, with the first being, Empty the kitchen trash, and ending with C Me.

I attended our usual Tuesday afternoon RSO meeting, where I found out the monkey was too decomposed to tell if it died from Yellow Fever.  But it was reported, there were four monkeys found in a 3 block radius from the Consulate that had died from the disease.

The week following the discovery at the Consulate, there were several teams from the Brazilian Government who combed the grounds for more evidence.  I am told the disease is transmitted by mosquito, and will only affect primates. (humans and the monkeys)

This is not a matter to be taken lightly, and something I am not used to.  In Moscow, both Terese and I contracted the H1N1 virus, which to me was just a very bad cold that last three or four days.  Ignorantly, I did not know I had the virus at the time and just went to work.   Terese evidently contracted it from me.  No telling who else did.

If you need an ambulance in Sao Paulo, you may have to wait up to four hours for one.  Find a dead monkey and emergency crews will arrive within the hour.

Last week, one of the Local Guard Forces (LGF) was making his rounds when he happened across a small dead monkey on the grounds near my shop.  I personally would have thought nothing of it after spending two years in Ethiopia, but here it is a different story.

This was on a weekend and within minutes, the Consulate was on lock-down.  No one was allowed on compound unless they have been vaccinated against Yellow Fever.  This was a shocker to me.

I went in to the Consulate the next day, Sunday, to do some work and yellow tape had cordoned off the area around my shop.  Terese and I both were vaccinated before going to Ethiopia so it was not an issue for me.  I was able to slip in around the building to get to my shop.

The next day, Monday, guards were positioned at the entrance to the Consulate allowing only those who had been vaccinated into the compound.  The rest were directed to a vaccination post, where Bombeiros (Brazilian Fire Fighters) gave Yellow Fever vaccinations to those who did not have them.  This was not a trivial matter.  It was an active attempt to control a possible outbreak of a deadly disease.

This is Monday, a week later and the monkey still has not been determined to have died from Yellow Fever, but it is not an issue they will take lightly.  Since I am in the Security Office, I saw the pictures of the monkey.  It was only about 5-6 inches long, still very young, yet it sent a shock wave through the Consulate and the Brazilian Government.  No small matter.

We often take for granted what we have and never realize how close we are to our demise.  Many things in our lives can be our ruin, yet we are still able to walk the streets comfortably, thanks to Science and Technology.

I have become good friends with the nurse at the Consulate.  She is Brazilian and spent a few years in Tennessee of all places, where she learned her perfect use of English.  I am often amazed how many of the foreigners I meet in the world who learn our crazy language, can speak it better than this old Texan, who lived in the US for a crazy number of years, and then some.  One of our beautiful friends we met in Adana, Turkey learned her English in Tennessee also.  I don’t know what it is about Tennessee, but it has made a difference in many lives.

I have had a few short discussions with this Brazilian friend, and realize her personality is unlike any I have interacted with.  Although she is a nurse, she is also a mathematician.  That alone raises all sort of interests in my mind, because it points to someone who I can have a good discussion with.  For some reason, I am drawn to people of intellect.

A few weeks ago, she sent me an email politely suggesting me to drop by the Health Unit to visit.  So, I dropped everything and went by to see how she was doing, where she told me she and her fiance were getting married and asked if I wanted to attend.  I was elated!  “Ah … yeah!!  Will there be Brazilian women there?”  She laughed and said, “Of course!”

The wedding was in Brasilia, the capital of Brazil, and hour and half by plane.  I quickly made reservations for air-flight and hotel.

So below are pictures I took of the ceremony.  The wedding was announced to be at 5:30 pm, but it did not actually start until 6:30.  This is Brazil.

There was a small string ensemble with a flute, playing light music that seemed to float among the trees.Then it was down to business …Afterwards, the quests headed for the food as the couple prepared for the reception.  Food ….  that was an understatement, and as would be expected in Brazil, the Country of passion and colors, the settings themselves were works of art. And here is the table with the wedding cake, in the center.These two people are completely opposites and yet I see how they will compliment each other throughout their marriage.  She is vibrant and sociable and he is quiet and reserved.  Where he is subdued, she will boost him up.  Where she is bouncing off the walls, he will calm her down.He is an American from Tennessee, who is an engineer for the automobile manufacturer Nissan, and they are planning to move to Japan with his job soon.  These are good people, and I look forward to seeing what happens to them in the next 10 years.   … a new Adventure for them.

As for us, keep kicking butt.